Saturday, October 16, 2010

a different sort of post

My normally slow life has picked up speed and is trotting along at an unsettling quick pace. Meanwhile, my brain is clomping along and my knees are crick-creaking and my feet thump-thumping and I just can't keep up.

And it's all a mess. And it's all too much therapy and too much pressure for anti-depressants, anti-anxieties, anti-idontgiveadamns. Me? OCD? Not at all. Please don't medicate me for that. Depression? Don't we all have that? eh...

I've stopped running now. I'm sitting on the couch with a bag of chips between my knees, moving fist to face on repeat. Sitting there, watching my normally slow life whiz past faster than I can process it.

Coax myself to my feet, take a cautious step and crumple into a heap on the floor. Can't get up, too heavy. My creaky knees won't support me. Take a fork and knife and eat and eat until I've eaten myself away.

Save the heart for last, it's the tastiest bit.

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